Lonely Platter Guide to Pringles

Passport to Flavourtown

Lidl has long delivered on eye-catching crisps. My catnip. Notable packets of the past year include the pesto lattice lads from Italian week, gazpacho kettle-style guys from Spanish week and, in the collab of this mystifying modern era, Emily in Paris x Lidl mustard madames from French week. Chic.

On that European travel theme, look what flew in this month: limited-edition Pringles Passport Flavours.

I have a great respect, if not a great love, for Pringles. You can argue that they’re not proper crisps, as they’re formed with dehydrated processed potato rather than sliced from an actual tuber.¹ However, as I always say, you can’t argue with their aerodynamic and stackable hyperbolic paraboloid figure. Invented in the 1950s as a response to complaints about broken crisps and too much air in packaging, Pringles were designed using supercomputers at Procter & Gamble – the double curvature of their form prevents a line of stress occurring, making the crisps strong and resistant to breakage, yet thin and very crunchy. Plus you can do the classic duck bill trick with two of them. The acclaimed sci-fi and fantasy author (and plant engineer) Gene Wolfe helped develop the machine that makes them. Supercomputers! Aerodynamics! Rehydrated non-foodstuffs! Go figure. He also bears a striking resemblance to moustachioed Julius Pringles of the logo, but reportedly this is coincidental.

Anyhow, let’s hurtle towards a taste test. I hold my hands up at the top: this will not be fully comprehensive. I should have grabbed a tube of every available flavour when I first clocked them, but unfortunately I slept on it. Despite going to four different Lidls, including two in south London when on a one-day wine academy course, I was unable to track down Moroccan Style Roasted Pepper & Hummus (though I reckon I have a good idea of exactly what these might taste like?). And, distressingly, Greek Style Tzatziki were nowhere to be seen despite the web telling me they existed. Interesting to note that Lidl have doubled up on Italian Style (Italy week was a hit, lest we forget!) and I’m not one to argue. We’ll get to it as we go on, but one of them is arguably more Italian-American Style. Also, my taste buds may have been mildly compromised by slurping a very spicy margarita shortly ahead of the tasting. Conversely, they were also well-trained and alert due to a day of sampling, spittooning and scrutinising an endless delight of wines. In a final bit of housekeeping, two of us conducted the taste test together, so there are two scores for each. The rating system is 0 to 5 moustaches.

Onwards!

Spanish Style Patatas Bravas Flavour

Expectation

Surely this will just be paprika flavour?? Patatas bravas is spicy potato, spiked with paprika – very achievable in a potato-based snack I would think.

Tasting Notes

The immediate and overwhelming flavour profile is very sweet. Is this to try and emulate buttery tomato perhaps? Unsuccessful, too one-note. There is a hint of heat, though not paprika, and it’s felt more harshly on the finish. These are geared towards comforting fatty flavours of butter and oil, presumably to reference the patatas fried in fat. Tastes like a sweet buttery mash that’s been downwind of a pinch of chilli powder.

Authenticity

Very little. More authentic to generic ‘potato flavour’, and the artificial comfort thereof.

Suggested Dip Pairing

Aioli, or a fridge-cold onion and garlic tub.

Rating

He: 1 moustache
Me: 2 moustaches

Italian Style Focaccia Flavour

Expectation

There are illustrations of both rosemary and basil on the tube, which feels promising. If the Pringle is the bread, the seasoning needs to elevate it and transport us to Italy.

Tasting Notes

He is instantly impressed, whereas I am assaulted by salt. And not the posh crystal or rock of a good focaccia. You can taste the rosemary – this is the strongest note other than salt, and contributes to a long finish. It’s reminiscent of rosemary-infused olive oil. No trace of basil, but there’s definitely a smattering of oregano flavour. A salty, herby crisp with an increased richness.

Authenticity

This does hit the right notes, but mostly from associated herbs. The savoury base Pringle does work as the focaccia dough. A surprisingly effective simulation.

Suggested Dip Pairing

Muhammara, or a very garlicky, lemony tzatziki.

Rating

He: 3.5 moustaches
Me: 3 moustaches

Italian Style Pepperoni Pizza Flavour

Expectation

Many a crisp has tried to replicate pizza before now, to varying degrees of success (Pizza Hut Margherita Lays: oily, herby, meh). The Pringle lends itself fairly well to a thick-ish pizza base, so a lot will come down to the tom-mozz-’roni topper.

Tasting Notes

I immediately get the taste of pepperoni – those tiny crisp discs of pizza pepperoni cupping wells of oil. There’s a slight touch of mozzarella via a lactic cheesiness in the background, and a hint of sweetness and acidity for tomato. Good depth.

Authenticity

Very high. Though as mentioned, I would argue that this is actually Italian-American Style. I felt I was breathing out pepperoni. He thought it was a triumph of concept over experience, a successful science experiment but not necessarily a good crisp. I thought it a tasty bite!

Suggested Dip Pairing

Dominos Garlic & HerbTM of course. You could do something tomato-based to bring out that part of a slice, though I prefer contrast to matching when it comes to dunking.

Rating

He: 2 moustaches
Me: 4 moustaches

French Style Steak Frites Flavour

Expectation

Again, this seems ripe for replicating as it includes a potato component. Flame grilled steak is another common crisp flavour, based in smoke and umami – I’m interested to see how this slightly more comprehensive dish fares upon a Pringle plate.

Tasting Notes

This a less appealing colour, looking a little anaemic and grey. But beef is definitely present. The steak is far from rare, with the browned crust of a medium to well-done cut coming through and a lingering savoury-sweet of meat on the finish. There’s a slight touch of some herb (?) and traces of garlic too. Deeply savoury.

Authenticity

If I ordered a steak and it came like this, then thumbs down. But it is a bit roast beefy. And there’s a good length that’s reminiscent of steak.

Suggested Dip Pairing

Sour cream and chive, creamy and acidic. Or possibly baba ganoush, for the savoury smoke.

Rating

He: 4 moustaches
Me: 3 moustaches

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I was going to do a wine pairing with each crisp. But frankly just go with Champagne for all. (Or any traditional method fizz of your choosing.) The biscuity, buttery, brioche notes would pair well with the carbs, but the bubbles, light lemon peel and high acidity cut though all the fat and salt. We made do with the charmat method, pear drop corner shop Prosecco, and had a high time.

I’ve learnt that I want a garlic dip with pretty well everything. And that I’ll be eating Pringles all week.

1. Lidl’s own-brand is called Snaktastic Potato Snack Tubes. Ambiguous regarding the crisp question, non-ambiguous when it comes to doing what it says on the tube.